Grateful: sometimes memories can be so funny

The weather has been spectacular here for the past few days.  With summer coming on, lots of friends have been talking about grilling, partying outside, etc.  My gas grill has needed a new burner for a long time.  Actually, I should have replaced it last year.  I did buy a new burner and ignition switches on eBay last year, but I never put them in.  So, a post from a Facebook friend today motivated me to get out there and do it.  I couldn’t find the owner’s manual for my grill, but hey – how hard could it be?  Some of the screws were a bit corroded, but I managed to dis-assemble the parts, install the new ones, and it’s working like it’s brand-new.  So, that took me back.  How long had this burner lasted?

I got the grill in April 2007.  Why do I remember that?  Because, I went to Costco with my new sweetheart, Freddie, to buy it.  We brought the grill home, and I was so excited that I had a man to help me assemble it.  Well, let’s put it this way, I was excited that I had an extra set of hands to help me assemble it.  Now, you need to realize there is a Steller method to assembling things.  You just go for it and, if you run into a problem, you read the destructions.  My brain and my hands work really well at putting things together.  Fred’s skills at assembling things were, alas, mediocre to poor.  He grumbled and complained through the whole ordeal and, about 3/4 of the way through, I sent him inside to get something to eat so I could finish the assembly in peace!  Things went much more smoothly without him in my way.

Later on, when I discovered the horrible truth about Fred — strippers, dominatrices, drugs, etc., — and I threw all his stuff out of the house and changed the locks, I had the goodness in my heart to loan him a little dome tent so he could sleep in the woods.  He called me from the campground the first night to complain that it was really cruel to loan someone a tent that was so difficult to set up.  WHAT?  It was a simple dome tent with two shock-corded poles (so, they were already half-assembled), that formed an X in the sleeves on the tent and you bent them and set the thing up!  How much simpler could it be?  An idiot could do it.  Well . . .  perhaps not.

Anyway, if any of you gals are still single, I highly recommend the gas grill assembly test as the key to whether or not your relationship will work.  Tis the season — go buy a new grill and see if your man can handle it.  If not, best to end it now.  You’ll save yourself a whole lot of trouble!  I’m so grateful that I had this little test and yes, I’m grateful that I stopped that relationship before it went a step farther.  Life is great!


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