If you are about to retire, I would highly recommend that you just do it. Pick your last day and don’t work past it. I have done something that I would not advise anyone to do. I retired April 1, but figured I would fill in until they hired someone else for my job. NOT a good idea. 1) you will regret that you are not free; 2) although the extra income is nice (pension, plus a salary), no amount of paying off your bills is worth your sanity; 3) people treat you really strangely, as though you don’t really exist, but you’d best damn well take care of their paperwork. I have been doing my best to figure out my financials and, while it may not be the most financially sound plan, I would like to leave work at the end of this month. Okay, I really thought about it, and I probably won’t leave until the end of next month. This will pay my bills off, provide me with half the money for my IQ (Intelliquilter add-on to my longarm) and leave me with a very small payment for the remainder each month that I can pay by doing someone else’s quilt or by surviving on what’s in the freezer. I figure people will be finishing their holiday quilts soon and business will be hopping again.
Anyway today is the solstice and Ozzie and I were enjoying it very much. We went outside to play ball twice. The weather is beautiful, even though the grass pollen is in the extremely high range. My allergy meds are doing the trick and I was happy. I was making good progress on the pile of work on my desk. Then, for some reason out of the blue, the faculty decided to throw me a retirement surprise. I think just a gathering to say thanks and hand me a card (supposedly with money in it), but I’m not really sure because I bolted. I had made quite clear that I wanted no retirement party. I had told them if they threw me one, I wouldn’t come, and if they surprised me, I would leave. I left. It upset me so badly I had to come home. Chest pains (anxiety attack) and an extreme headache. I am puzzled. Why 1) a surprise gathering with a card full of money is supposed to make people feel better about treating you like crap for 23 years (my time in that one office, although I’ve been at the U for 32), and 2) what the hell is so special about today? I retired April 1. Nary a soul said boo. I’m supposed to stay till September 30, but that will not happen. I’m trying to force myself to stay till July 31. So why try to bribe me on June 21? I have no clue. I’ll never understand. I’m at a total loss, and have come home. I just feel the need to write about it. I don’t know why. To let it out? To try to write it down so I can find the logical sense in it? I don’t know. I wish I didn’t care.